20th Birthday

Now it's already 31st January 2009 2:57 in the morning
Today it's my 20th b'day and i choose to stay alone
Not goin out with frens or family
Not celebrating with frens or family

1st Thing wanna tell in this blog is to say sorry..
Sorry to my lovely frens...
Sorry Sherly for FFK....
Sorry Shawne for saying NO...
Sorry Mel for saying im busy...
Sorry Chris for saying im not free...
Sorry Jay for saying i just feel tired...
I know you guys got heart is enuff d...
I know you guys are sweet... plan to celebrate my b'day
I know you guys know how i feel for this year b'day...
I know you guys afraid that i feel lonely n trying to persuade me out...
I know you guys wanna keep me busy rather think of some unecessary things~
Guys~! You are wonderful, sweet n cheerful...
Thank you for each gang of you all being so sweet to me...
I dont wanna let you guys feel disappointed, so that's why i dont wanna show up at this moment...
n also why i keep myself at genting, dont willing to stay at KL
I also know if you guys wanted to look for me is actually very easy,
but the thing is i trust you guys wont break my privacy

Someone did ask me why m i ignoring all the invitation
and come to genting alone
Someone knows the true reason, someone dont...
I dont really willing to explain much... Just let it be... what i can tell is
you guys can say i'm trying to runaway,
im trying to avoiding from the truth
that's why im here at this location far from the so call 'hal hal susah disolve'
I been thru alot of things eversince the end of November in 2008...
At 1st I tot I'm enjoying my life like no one else did...
But once come to this end of November,
everything seems out of control...
It's doesn't goes with the actual plan...
Everything comes in a sudden...
No matter in which anger what sector which respect also not right...
I really gonna breakdown one day or the next second if all all these not gonna settle...
Sometimes really think except me myself can save kusendiri
Siape lagi boleh help me? Answer is: 'I've to makan sendiri"